This may be a "woman" thing (or possibly a "just me" thing), but why is it that the world always looks better when I'm showered and looking good? I guess that begs the question then, "Why do I stay in my pjs all day with yucky mouth and bed hair?"
Alot has happened in the past week that has given me the excuse to live in my pjs and mope. Many people (which stands for ME) use the well worn phrase "I need some relax time" when their life gets overwhelming and chaotic, but I believe that I may have started abusing it. :)
Just as an umbrella to cover all I'm about to share, I'm sick-ish (some weird cold or allergy thing that is taking my voice and energy) and currently I'm sweaty and my breath reeks of tuna. So I'll try not to dwell on the sucky part:
I have been having problems with my right ankle for about a year now. Chad and I were beginning to play tennis and after one exhilirating night, that I smoked him, I came home and noticed that my ankle was bothering me. After that it started to get painful and swell, so I assumed that I sprained it and promptly wrapped it, elevated with ice and stayed that way for about 3 days.
My assumption that things were fine started to change when I noticed occasional swelling, different levels of pain, and lots of weakness in my ankle over the next 11 months. (I know, I know, I just wanted it to get better on its own....I'm sorry!) It was all getting progressively worse, so I went to the doctor who referred me to a orthopedic specialist in Clarksville.
Come to find out, I have torn my peroneal tendon in my right ankle and now I need surgery. Nice. The whole process involves ten days off my feet, three weeks on crutches and in a cast, then 4 weeks in a boot and physical therapy. <sigh>
Of course, this couldn't happen at a better time with Young Women's Camp only 4 weeks away and Chad coming home for R&R in 6 weeks. I can't be at camp with this going on and I don't want to screw up our R&R plans. Crap!
Earlier this week, I had an emotional happen-stance with some people in my life. I don't want to get into the details for the respect of all individuals, but I'm give some generalities. During a gathering with some individuals, there was a crazy heated exchange of words. Okay, whatever, it was a freaking mess! I have never seen people scream, freak out, accuse, hurt, and be so un-adult in my life. At least not in my adult life. It was horrible and soooooo disappointing! I was looking forward to a honest and open exchange with some other adults to resolve differences and was just plain out hurt. The attack on my character was especially painful, along with the untruths. I wish I could articulate it better, but I really do want to keep it private for everyone's sake.
CJ was also sick this week, which started out as leg pain. I assumed it to be growing pains but it just got worse with chills, sleepiness, and then I discovered great red welts on one of his legs. I took him to the doctor and he was diagnosed with Cellulitis (Cellulitis is a skin infection caused by bacteria. Normally, your skin helps protect you from infection. But if you have a cut, sore, or insect bite, bacteria can get into the skin and spread to deeper tissues.) He got put on a strong antibiotic, which I had to play "find out where my prescription went", and that was that.
Until later that day, while wrestling with our 70lb puppy, the dog stepped on CJ's eye. <sigh> Lots of pain, ice, and ibuprofin later, it was not getting better and he couldn't open his eye. So after I dropped Heav off at Church activities, I UNFORTUNATELY went to the ER at BACH (Blanchfield Army Community Hospital). FOUR HOURS LATER, we got home at 11:30pm......on a school night. Then I had to take him to an opthomalogist the next day, along with taking him to my own appointments. He's fine, btw. They said he probably had an abrasion that healed within 12 hours. He also has his first shiner, from the dog. :)
There's also been a ton of meetings I've had to cancel this week due to all of my craziness and that just makes me feel like I'm dropping the ball.
NOW.......lets get dressed and brush my teeth.
Isn't it funny how you can drive the same route many times and not notice that they have built something new. That happens to me many times on my 35+ minute drive home from town. I'm used to it, so I kind of go on autopilot and my mind stays in my car. Then one day I'll exclaim, "Heav look at that, they put a new roof on that house," which she will respond by sighing, "Mom that's been there for like a month." Oh.
It is so easy to not notice what is going on around us. It is extremely easy, however, to notice the things that happen TO us. We get caught up and focused only on ourselves. I think that's why it's so easy for many of us (again ME) to create a list a million miles long of the things going wrong in our lives and to sit around in our pjs with tuna mouth. It takes effort to get up, brush our teeth, and pick out what makes us look not like a cow, just like it takes effort to open our eyes and take a look around at what good things are happening. Such as:
I am blessed that I may have the option of putting off my surgery till after Chad's R&R (fingers crossed), but even if that doesn't happen, camp will still go on, Chad will love being with his family and most importantly I will be on the road to getting better.
The day after that nuclear powwow, I received a message from one person expressing remorse for their actions. It was a blessing of monumental importance to me cause Heavenly Father knew I needed that little restoration of the good that I know people have inside themselves. I was humbled and overjoyed all at once.
CJ is healthy and on the road to complete recovery. I have the blessing of sharing in his life another day and the privalege to be his mother. We may have had lots of stress, lots to do and little sleep, but the Lord provided. A friend came to the ER and talked with me for a while. Other friends helped by picking up the slack in other areas of my life. Most astonishingly, some things I had to do were canceled giving me the opportunity to catch up on sleep and rest my weary body.
Good things surround us all the time. Sometimes we are just too busy with our issues to look up and take notice. I am grateful that the Lord has helped me to open my eyes and remember that I am truly loved and looked after. We all are! :)
